Orange is the New Black
by Jack E. Peace
Summary: Aubrey throws her hands up in defeat. "Fine. Next time you want to do something stupid, I'm going to just let you do it. I'm not going to try and talk you out of it and I'm not going to go with you. Maybe then I won't end up in jail."


**Disclaimer: **Characters you know aren't mine. Title isn't mine either.

**A/N: **So this is probably the most random thing I've ever written. I'm not feeling well and was under the influence of cold medicine when I sat down at my computer. Also I just really wanted the excuse to use this title. Hopefully it's not _too_ terrible random...

**"Orange is the New Black"**

"Look, Aubrey, I said I was sorry, okay?"

Aubrey Posen is not amused. She's actually so far from amused that she's crossing the border into pissed and from there it's a short jump to silent treatment for life. She sits on the bench and stares straight ahead, her arms crossed over her chest, expression stony.

Chloe comes to sit down beside her but Aubrey pays her no mind. "I'm sorry." She says again, giving the blonde the best puppy dog eyes she can manage. "Are you just going to sit here and not talk to me?"

Aubrey nods curtly and turns her head away from Chloe. But Chloe doesn't leave, inching closer to Aubrey on the bench. Which is really the last thing that Aubrey wants to deal with right about now. As if things weren't bad enough.

Unfortunately there's not much around to distract her attention from Chloe, though Aubrey still refuses to look at her roommate. She'll stare at the ugly beige and blue painted walls with their flaking paint all night before she'll give Chloe the satisfaction. The walls have seen years and years of grime and it makes Aubrey shudder to think about what substances these walls have endured. The peeling paint and bricks are also marred with clever graffiti like _Rachel is a bitch_ and _John sells good shit_, etched in pen.

"Aubrey…" Chloe whines. "You can't just ignore me. What else is there to do?" Chloe is practically leaning her head on Aubrey's shoulder and if Aubrey wants to escape the proximity, she's got to brush against the questionable walls. Not that she's ever been good at pushing Chloe away.

And even though Chloe has a good point, that doesn't mean that Aubrey has to admit it. Or give in and start talking. She doesn't have much to say at this point anyway. So she just keeps looking at the walls and puzzling over how someone can possibly misspell the word "bitch" that many times.

Chloe huffs out a breath and matches Aubrey's scowl and crossed-arm posture. "Fine. We'll just sit here. Not talking. Whatever." She mutters. A few moments of silence go by before Chloe adds, "I can be quiet too. I can do this all night if I have to. If this is the way you want it. Silent treatment it is."

Aubrey just rolls her eyes.

* * *

_Alice smacks the ruler against the white board in the auditorium and the Bellas jump as the sound cracks through the room. Aubrey sits up straighter in her seat, making her posture appropriately attentive. For a moment, Alice just surveys the girls in front of her; the girls are sweaty and tired from nearly two hours of cardio and choreography and she's half tempted to make them start running laps again, just because she can. She frowns when she notices Chloe's head nodding forward slightly, like she's seconds away from falling asleep right there in the middle of practice. As she debates the merits of whacking the redhead with the ruler, Aubrey nudges Chloe in the side and the other girl jerks up, refocusing her attention and robbing Alice of her chance for some corporal punishment. _

_ For several minutes, Alice keeps the girls in suspense, the atmosphere in the auditorium thick with tension. Finally, she stops pacing and stands in front of them. "Do you ladies think this is acceptable?" No one says anything. Alice narrows her eyes. "Do you!" _

_ "No!" Comes the chorus of voices, the loudest being Aubrey's, which grates on Alice's nerves for some reason. _

_ "No, it's not acceptable." Alice shakes her head. "It's not acceptable that the Trebles treat us this way. And it's not acceptable that we let them." _

_ Despite their best efforts, evidence of the recent Trebles sabotage can still be seen around the auditorium. The crude graffiti drawings on the walls are going to have to be cleaned off by the campus janitorial staff, which is definitely more embarrassment than Alice feels like they should have to endure. They got most of the toilet paper and eggs cleaned up but she has the feeling that they're going to be dealing with this little prank for the next several days. _

_ "So what do you ladies suggest that we do?" Alice questions, tapping the ruler against the palm of her hand. She resumes her pacing, studying the rest of the Bellas carefully. They all seem too tired to be appropriately intimidated by her display. "Should we just take this lying down?" _

_ "We need to retaliate." Aubrey chimes in right away. "Launch a counter strike." _

_ Even though Alice finds Aubrey and her military platitudes endlessly annoying (seriously, if she hears one more of Daddy Posen's life lessons she's going to go crazy), she does have to admit that Aubrey's thoughts line up with her own. And so, Alice just nods. "Right. A little payback." _

_ Alice quickly outlines her plan for hitting the Trebles where it hurts. She knows that they have an extravagant trophy case in the living room of their trashy, reject-frat-house and she also knows that some graffiti and eggs will only amuse Bumper and the rest of the guys. But if they somehow manage to get their hands on even just one of the trophies, then the Trebles will be sorry. _

_ And this is the plan that Alice outlines to the rest of the Bellas. It's simple enough with only a few small crimes involved. Easy. _

_ "So who among you is Bella enough to go into the Treble house and get the trophies?" Alice questions, looking from girl to girl. "Who here is going to make her sisters and the sisters that have come before her proud?" _

_ Predictably, no one volunteers. And Alice is definitely not going to undertake this mission herself. Her eyes slide across the exhausted and uncomfortable faces in front of her, finally settling on Aubrey. A smile starts to spread across her face but before she can anoint Aubrey as the person destined to carry out this act of revenge, Chloe raises her hand, suddenly seeming more awake than she has all practice. "I'll do it." _

_ Aubrey looks surprised and Alice just frowns. Foiled again. She's had it with this pair. But she forces a sly smile on her face and just nods. "Excellent, Chloe. I like your go-getter attitude. That's what being a Bella is all about." _

_ Or something._

* * *

Chloe lets out a heavy sigh and leans back, her head resting against the wall behind them. Aubrey quickly pushes her upright, an expression of panic on her face. "Don't do that! You have no idea what you might catch from this place. You can't just go leaning against the walls." Aubrey says.

"Ha!" Chloe smiles at her victoriously. "I knew you wouldn't be able to ignore me forever!"

Aubrey just rolls her eyes. "Excuse me for not feeling like talking right now." She mumbles.

Chloe just sighs. "I said I was sorry."

Aubrey glares at her. "I'm not quite sure that a simple sorry is going to really fix this situation, Chloe." She grumbles. "Look around you. Do you see where we are?" Chloe starts to protest and Aubrey interjects. "We're sitting in a holding cell! In jail!"

Chloe huffs out a breath, unable to come up with an appropriate response at the moment.

"Yeah…I mean this looks pretty bad…" Chloe finally admits.

Aubrey arches an eyebrow. "It _looks_ bad?" She repeats. "I'm pretty sure it _is_ bad." She glances around at the women sharing the holding cell with them. An obviously drunk teenager, a woman who looks like she might be a prostitute and another woman who was arrested for destroying her boyfriend's motor cycle because he was cheating on her. At least, that's the story that Aubrey has put together form overhearing her many phone conversations with her friends on the phone in the cell. "We're in jail."

"Yeah…that is pretty bad…"

* * *

_"I really don't think this is a good idea." Aubrey tells Chloe, not for the first time. Probably not for the fiftieth time but who's really keeping track? "Alice can't ask you to do something so ridiculous. Not to mention illegal. Don't do this, Chlo." _

_ Chloe doesn't disagree with anything that Aubrey has said but she can't exactly back down now. She's not really afraid of what Alice is going to do. At least, not what Alice is going to do to_ her_ anyway. But she's not about to explain to Aubrey why she can't back out. _

_ "It won't be so bad." Chloe assures her roommate. "I'll just go in Friday night when they're doing…whatever it is that they do and grab the trophy and take it to Alice. Easy-peasy." _

_ But Aubrey doesn't look convinced. She's sitting on the edge of Chloe's bed, trying not to watch Chloe as she changes out of her clothes from Bellas practice. Chloe has never been shy about that type of thing and Aubrey can't exactly explain _why_ it makes her uncomfortable so she just averts her eyes and tries to ignore the heat rising in her cheeks. Developing a crush on the person she's lived with for the past three years was definitely not a wise decision on her part but Aubrey has never really been one for wise decisions apparently. Otherwise she never would have let herself become infatuated with Chloe in the first place. _

_ "I just don't think it's a good idea." Aubrey mumbles. She really hates Alice for putting Chloe in this position, even though she has no idea why Chloe volunteered herself in the first place. "This can't end well." _

_ Chloe flops down on the bed beside Aubrey, pulling her friend down onto the mattress beside her. "You worry too much, Bree." Chloe remarks, trying to go for flippant even though she really doesn't want to undertake a task that involves breaking, entering and theft. _

_ Aubrey knows she should move away from Chloe but she just can't. "Yeah, I think I have cause to worry." She argues. "You know, you're just committing a crime. No big deal. You're right, I'm worrying for nothing." She rolls her eyes. _

_ "Fine, come with me then." Chloe suggests. "You can be my lookout." She smiles at her roommate. "That way you can make sure nothing happens to me." _

_ Well, when she puts it like that how can Aubrey possibly refuse?_

* * *

"Pretty bad." Aubrey mumbles, repeating Chloe's words. "Yeah. I'd say so. We're in jail. _Jail_." She glares at Chloe. "My dad is going to kill me if he finds out." Her face pales, as though this idea has only just occurred to her. "Oh my god. What if he finds out? He'll disown me. He'll never speak to me again. What if he finds out?"

Chloe reaches out to take Aubrey's hand, lacing their fingers together in hopes that the touch will calm her down. "He's not going to find out, Bree." She assures her roommate. "Just don't worry about that."

But Aubrey pulls her hand away from Chloe's, looking at her friend with an accusatory expression in her eyes. "You don't know that. He could find out. He might find out. And then what?" She questions, her voice bordering on hysterical. Even the drunk girl is looking in their direction. "I knew this was a horrible idea. I told you not to do this. But you never listen to me!"

Chloe narrows her eyes slightly. "Oh, so this is all my fault?" She snaps. "No one forced you to come along."

"Well someone had to make sure that nothing happened." Aubrey fires back.

Chloe gives her a look. "Yeah, you did a great job of that Bree." She mutters.

"Now it's _my_ fault?" Aubrey glares at her. "I tried to talk you out going. I told you it wasn't a good idea. I asked you not to go. But you never listen to me!"

The woman currently under arrest for destruction of property (something she currently has in common with Aubrey) glares at them from across the holding cell. "Can you settle down?" She shakes her head, seeming annoyed by the whole thing. "Is she always this intense?" She looks at Chloe.

Chloe just rolls her eyes. "Yes." She glares at Aubrey. "She is."

Aubrey throws her hands up in defeat. "Fine. Next time you want to do something stupid, I'm going to just let you do it. I'm not going to try and talk you out of it and I'm not going to go with you. Maybe then I won't end up in jail."

* * *

_The Treble house looks uninhabited as far as Chloe can tell and she's really ready to just get in there and get out and put this whole stupid idea behind her. She and Aubrey are crouched in the bushes in front of the property, shivering in the October wind. There are a few lights on in the upstairs windows but she figures that could be the result of careless Trebles and nota sign that a few members of the group are still hanging around the house. _

_ According to Marissa, one of the other Bellas, the Trebles are hanging out at Tin Lizzy's trying to pick up women and free drinks. This is the perfect time to get into the house and get the trophies. But Chloe still finds herself hesitating. Stupid Alice and her stupid ideas. _

_ "You don't have to do this." Aubrey says once more. It's become her constant refrain recently. "Let's just go back home and watch a movie. We can watch that Sandra Bullock movie you've been talking about." _

_ Chloe gives her a tight smile. "As soon as we get the trophy, we'll go back." She assures Aubrey. _

_ Aubrey frowns. "You're missing the point." _

_ "It won't be so bad." Chloe assures her. "I just have to get in and then it's easy." She gets to her feet, brushing grass off her jeans. "You just be the lookout." _

_ Aubrey purses her lips as she watches Chloe hurry across the yard and toward the front door. They spent the past two hours watching Youtube videos about lock picking and Aubrey is actually amazed when Chloe is able to get into the house without much issue. Clearly the Internet is good for more than school work. _

_ However, Aubrey starts growing more and more anxious the longer it takes Chloe to come back out. What is she doing in there? How hard is it to find a trophy case? She's about to abandon her post and go after Chloe when headlights wash across the front of the house. Aubrey feels her heart start thudding in her chest and it only gets worse when she sees a car pull into the driveway. She recognizes it as Bumper's stupid, environment-hating Hummer and Aubrey feels like she's going to throw up right there in the bushes. She swallows, trying to suppress the urge. _

_ Bumper and several of the other Trebles get out of the car, listening to some idiotic story Bumper is already in the middle of. "I hate that place anyway. I'm glad they threw me out." He's saying as they walk up the path toward the front door. "Now I don't have to ever go back there again. And the chicks there are ugly anyway. They don't deserve all this." _

_ Aubrey glances toward the house. There's still no sign of Chloe, which is probably a good thing because if she's walking toward the front door right now she's going to run right into Bumper and the others. But if Chloe realizes that they're on their way…maybe she can sneak out the back door…_

_ Aubrey looks around for something she can use to distract Bumper and the others before they can reach the front door. She just needs to buy Chloe a little more time…She grabs a rock and throws it toward the house before she can tweak her plan. She intends for the rock to land near the path or maybe even hit Bumper but her aim is way off. She's never been the athletic type. The rock goes through the living room window, shattering the glass and effectively stopping the Trebles in their tracks. _

_ Aubrey gets to her feet, gaping at the broken window. Donald glances in her direction, looking even more surprised to see her standing there than he is to see the broken window. Before he can alert the others to her presence, the front door opens and Chloe steps out onto the front step holding the Trebles' championship trophy from last year's ICCA Finals. _

_ Chloe freezes when she sees the Trebles standing there and Aubrey looking like a deer caught in the headlights. It takes Bumper only a few seconds more to recover from the surprise of the unfolding events and a pleased grin spreads across his face. He pulls his phone out of his pocket and starts dialing campus police. "Oh, this is great. Best performance of the year, ladies." He assures them before giving the officer on duty an overly exaggerated explanation of what's going on. _

_ Chloe holds Aubrey's hand as best as she can as they sit in the back of a police car with their hands cuffed behind their backs._

* * *

"Well why did you insist on coming anyway?" Chloe snaps, glaring at Aubrey. "You could have said no. You could be safely back home right now, still being Daddy's perfect daughter."

Aubrey narrows her eyes. "What was I supposed to do? Just let you go by yourself?"

"Yeah! Maybe that would have been better!_ I_ wouldn't have thrown a rock through the window!" Chloe shouts.

"I was trying to help you!" Aubrey can't stop her voice from rising in pitch. "I was trying to distract them!"

Chloe rolls her eyes. "Well, next time don't help me, okay Aubrey?" She mutters. "And I won't help you either."

Whatever retort Aubrey was about to offer dies on her lips and she looks at Chloe quizzically. "What are you talking about?"

Chloe shakes her head. "Forget it. Just go back to ignoring me."

"No. I want to know what you're talking about." Aubrey pokes Chloe in the side and Chloe swats her hand away. "What do you mean?"

"Alice was going to make you go get the trophy." Chloe tells her, her tone slightly defeated. "I could tell; she had that mean look on her face. I thought if I did it then you wouldn't be dragged into her stupidity. Clearly I was wrong."

Aubrey just stares at her, surprised by Chloe's words. She'd been completely oblivious to Alice's intentions but clearly they hadn't escaped Chloe's attention. She's not quite sure what to say. "Why did you go to all this trouble for me?" She questions softly.

Chloe opens her mouth but closes it again before she can say anything. She just shrugs and shakes her head, looking away from Aubrey. "It doesn't matter." She says softly.

"Yes it does." Aubrey's own voice is barely audible. Everything else seems to fall away and all that matters to her is Chloe's answer.

Chloe looks back at her and there's a hint of resignation in her eyes. "Because I like you. Like I like you like you. And I don't like it when Alice bullies you just because she can. And I know I'm just an idiot and I've probably just ruined everything but you asked for it." She gives Aubrey a sad sort of smile. "You're worth the trouble, Aubrey."

Aubrey can't begin to formulate her thoughts into words. She doesn't know how to tell Chloe that she's worth all the trouble in the world, that she likes her likes her too (though she'd try to be a bit more poetic about it). She doesn't even know where to start. She's too surprised that this girl that she's been falling in love with inch by inch in spite of her best efforts just might be feeling the same way.

"You don't have to say anything." Chloe assures her.

At the same time, Aubrey says, "That's why I wanted to go with you." Chloe looks at her with interest. "I…I didn't want you to go alone. Or get in trouble. I…I like you too." Okay, maybe not more poetic. It's a huge relief to finally say the words out loud, to not worry about what would happen if her secret was found out.

Chloe raises her eyebrows, her surprise evident on her face. "Really?"

Aubrey just nods, suddenly embarrassed. She's been wondering what it would be like to tell Chloe the truth about how she felt about her and what it would be like to have Chloe feel the same way. She's always been wondering what it would be like to kiss her…

"Are ya'll gonna kiss?" The amused voice of the probable prostitute causes Chloe and Aubrey to look away from each other and in her direction. "Because they don't really like that shit around here."

Aubrey is sure that her face is tomato red. But Chloe just starts laughing and after a few seconds, Aubrey can't help but join in. This definitely wasn't the way she ever saw herself confessing her feelings to Chloe, not by a long shot. But she can't take the words back now and she doesn't want to, especially not if Chloe feels the same.

"Maybe we should save the rest of this conversation for after we get bailed out." Aubrey suggests once they finally manage to stop laughing.

Chloe grins at her and nods. "Good idea." She says. "Who did you call to bail us out?"

Aubrey frowns. "I thought you called someone."

Chloe purses her lips but doesn't say anything. Aubrey mirrors her expression and sighs. It's going to be a long night.

**end. **


End file.
